Structure of the Ego

The egoic mind is completely conditioned by the past. Its conditioning
is twofold: It consists of content and structure.
In the case of a child who cries in deep suffering because his toy has
been taken away, the toy represents content. It is interchangeable with any
other content, any other toy or object. The content you identify with is
conditioned by your environment, your upbringing, and surrounding culture.
Whether the child is rich or poor, whether the toy is a piece of wood shaped
like an animal or a sophisticated electronic gadget makes no difference as far
as the suffering caused by its loss is concerned. The reason why such acute
suffering occurs is concealed in the word “my,” and it is structural. The
unconscious compulsion to enhance one’s identity through association with
an object is built into the very structure of the egoic mind.
One of the most basic mind structures through which the ego comes
into existence is identification. The word “identification” is derived from the
Latin word idem, meaning “same” and facere, which means “to make.” So
when I identify with something, I “make it the same.” The same as what?
The same as I. I endow it with a sense of self, and so it becomes part of my
“identity.” One of the most basic levels of identification is with things: My
toy later becomes my car, my house, my clothes, and so on. I try to find
myself in things but never quite make it and end up losing myself in them.
That is the fate of the ego.